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The penguin that took a wrong turn and ended up on Kapiti Beach in New Zealand has much in common with many of the Mentees who come to us searching for their Tree on the other side of the Field. However well we identify a rewarding purpose for our life, events have a habit of making us take a wrong turn from time to time.

Some people think that makes planning a waste of time. “Who can forecast anything these days?” I hear about ten times a week. When we don’t know if a major currency is going to survive into July, the feeling of hopelessness is understandable.

Far from being a reason not to attempt forecasting, this should be a spur to making even greater efforts to plan our lives – and to have Plan B ready at all times. There is overwhelming evidence to show that those who plan succeed far better than those who don’t.

It’s like this. You will either be a passenger on the journey of life, or you will be the driver. The former can be very happy but must not have great expectations. S/he will go with the flow; that can be rewarding in a rather selfish way. Not our job to tell people that they shouldn’t be selfish but important for them to recognize that they will have some regret if their life is devoted only to themselves. But in the end it’s their decision.

Most people seek happiness in whatever way they think they will find it. Mr. Berlusconi, the Italian Prime Minister, has his partying ways; others prefer the silence of the monastic cell. There is only one way to achieve perfect happiness and that is by committing everything we do to the benefit of others.

Most of us have neither the inclination nor the discipline to do that, however well we understand the concept intellectually. In the search for balance even the most self-interested should devote some of their time and effort to other people’s needs. They also have to eat, to secure the future for themselves and their families in what looks like an increasingly expensive and drawn out old age, to provide some options other than merely surviving.

I learnt early on the way in which our plans can be derailed. My ambition to be a farmer was thwarted very soon after I had qualified and started my job by a serious accident. My plan for a rural life of hard physical work in UK was shot. So I made a new plan based on urban and international living. It is still a wonderful journey.

The Tree changes from time to time because events alter the assumptions on which our first Tree was based. That is both inevitable and good. We live long enough to have two, three or even four careers. What matters is that at any moment we know where is our Tree on the other side of the Field.

Having a destination is more important than reaching it.