May I say

May I say you’re pretty, may I say you’re fun?
If I can’t I’ll wonder what on earth PC has done.
May you say I’m handsome, may you say I’m wise?
If you can’t then can you learn to do it in disguise.

May I say you’re clever, may I say you’re smart?
If I can’t then how is our relationship to start?
May you say I’m thoughtful, may you say I’m kind?
If you can’t then how do I know what is on your mind?

May I ask for coffee, may I ask for tea?
If that is impossible then how parched we shall be.
May I request cookies, or a pretzel snack?
If the answer’s ‘no’ then I must say I’m going back.

May I ask a favour? May I have a moan?
If I really cannot then I’ll feel all alone.
May I grasp your fingers when I’m about to fall,
for you can grasp my hand with naught improper meant at all.

So if I do respect you, as indeed I do,
I hope our sense of humour will allow us to get through.
We will be most considerate, I hope we’ve always been,
but I can’t treat you all the time as though you were the Queen.